Dad Jokes

15448 readers

235 users here now

Description

This is a community for sharing those cheesy “dad” jokes that invoke an eye roll or chuckle.

Rules

Clean jokes only please. If you cannot tell this joke to a 5-year-old, you probably shouldn’t post it here. Please post edgier jokes to !unclejokes@lemmy.world
Must post text, image (e.g., meme), or direct link. Do not post external links that cannot be viewed directly from the community (e.g., link to joke website, Facebook, Instagram, etc.)
Follow Lemmy.World Code of Conduct

founded 1 year ago

MODERATORS

loopy@lemmy.world

1

67

Post text, images, or direct links only (lemmy.world)

submitted 1 year ago by loopy@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

5 comments fedilink

Please see the updated sidebar. Do not post external links to websites such as Facebook and Instagram.

2

170

Please post edgier jokes to the new Uncle Jokes community (lemmy.world)

submitted 1 year ago by loopy@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

12 comments fedilink

I just updated the sidebar. As a rule of thumb, if you cannot tell this joke to a 5-year-old, you should probably post it to the new community !unclejokes@lemmy.world

3

50

If you’re American when you go in the bathroom… (lemmy.world)

submitted 8 hours ago by Kintarian@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

6 comments fedilink

… and American when you come out, what are you while you're in the bathroom?

European.

4

66

Which bees make milk? (lemm.ee)

submitted 1 day ago by sag@lemm.ee to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

5 comments fedilink

BooBees

5

70

How do ghosts play the piano? (lemmy.ml)

submitted 1 day ago by TheImpressiveX@lemmy.ml to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

3 comments fedilink

They use sheet music.

6

900

This child wanted to be a Transformer for Halloween (ttrpg.network)

submitted 2 days ago by ZDL@ttrpg.network to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

63 comments fedilink

7

227

The man that invented the Ferris wheel never met the man who invented the merry-go-round. (lemmy.world)

submitted 2 days ago by FlyingSquid@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

11 comments fedilink

They moved in different circles.

8

386

There's a new virus making people forget 80s rock bands (lemmy.world)

submitted 2 days ago by ccunning@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

47 comments fedilink

No one knows the cure.

9

60

Did you hear that a bunch of lions escaped from the zoo and have been living in the park all spring and summer? (lemmy.world)

submitted 2 days ago by GraniteM@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

2 comments fedilink

It's okay, though. Pride goeth before the fall.

10

103

Why is it always so dark in Apple stores? (feddit.uk)

submitted 3 days ago by Hossenfeffer@feddit.uk to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

12 comments fedilink

Because they don't have windows.

11

236

I went to the library today and asked the librarian where I could find the books about paranoia (lemmy.world)

submitted 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) by solidgrue@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

5 comments fedilink

She whispered, "they're right behind you."

12

227

It's at least one foot long! (i.imgur.com)

submitted 3 days ago by justlookingfordragon@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

1 comments fedilink

13

38

My residential compound turns out to be haunted by a ghostly chicken. (ttrpg.network)

submitted 4 days ago by ZDL@ttrpg.network to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

5 comments fedilink

It's quite a fowl spirit, I'm led to understand.

14

305

Secret Jedi arts (lemmy.ca)

submitted 5 days ago by Cephalotrocity@biglemmowski.win to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

1 comments fedilink

15

-3

Did you hear about the new illusionist and rapper? (reddthat.com)

submitted 2 days ago by MrPhibb@reddthat.com to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

3 comments fedilink

No? Well, keep an eye out for a Poof Daddy show in your town

16

29

TIL that the immediate successors to the colonial rapid response forces and the Picket Guard were selected to be far shorter than the average man. (ttrpg.network)

submitted 1 week ago by ZDL@ttrpg.network to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

3 comments fedilink

Hence their name: the Minutemen.

17

516

Calvin and Klein (lemmy.world)

submitted 1 week ago by The_Picard_Maneuver@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

6 comments fedilink

18

256

Please don't murder me. I didn't write this! (ttrpg.network)

submitted 1 week ago by ZDL@ttrpg.network to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

20 comments fedilink

19

47

Knock knock (lemmy.world)

submitted 1 week ago by Kintarian@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

4 comments fedilink

Who's there? Dwayne. Dwayne who? Dwayne the bath tub I'm dwouning!

20

57

I spilled spot remover on my dog (lemmy.world)

submitted 2 weeks ago by Kintarian@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

3 comments fedilink

Now I can't find him

21

153

One of my friends told me that there are hard times ahead and people have stopped worshiping one of the old gods. (lemmy.world)

submitted 2 weeks ago by FlyingSquid@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

18 comments fedilink

I said, "who, Ra?"

He got angry and shouted, "IT'S NOTHING TO CELEBRATE!"

22

82

What did the ghost teacher say to her class? (lemmy.ml)

submitted 2 weeks ago by TheImpressiveX@lemmy.ml to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

1 comments fedilink

"Look at the board and I will go through it again."

23

542

What a beautiful carving (lemmy.world)

submitted 2 weeks ago by The_Picard_Maneuver@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

13 comments fedilink

24

125

I installed a window yesterday, it was a real pane (lemmy.world)

submitted 2 weeks ago by Kintarian@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

9 comments fedilink

25

27

What do you call a leader of small birds who likes giving gratuities? (sopuli.xyz)

submitted 2 weeks ago by rammer@sopuli.xyz to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

6 comments fedilink

Tippy Hedren