CthulhusIntern

For me, it's social dancing, specifically West Coast Swing. Because while there is just social dancing, and some who only do it, there's a bit of a culture of competition, and it has its own governing body for determining where you place in competitions, and when it does sound like a cult when described.

Like, I still have termination anxiety. When there's nothing obvious to do at work, I get really anxious, like there's something I'm forgetting to do.

What should be relaxing is a source of dread.

I've been unemployed for almost 6 months now. I wasn't even paid enough while I was working, but now, I've depleted all my savings, my credit card balance is going up, I'm not even sure how much longer I can keep collecting unemployment, I still have absolutely zero job prospects, I'm having a hard time affording anything that gives me genuine enjoyment.

Beyond money, I don't have a good social life. I really only have acquaintances who would all rather be with other people. Me thinking about finding love feels like me thinking about being a billionaire, basically just a fantasy so far from the conditions of my life, it's absurd.

If I finally get a job, what then? I still have to scrounge to financially recover? I'm still alone? What do I even have to live for?

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I completely forgot about the existence of Chalkzone until now.