Out of the loop

the war on christmas started with a preemptive strike by christmas invading thanksgiving, but thanksgiving had no allies. hardly even any songs. thanksgiving fell quickly. Now christmas has invaded halloween and even started attacking labor day. Halloween struck the September Alliance with Labor Day and has begun to fight back, but I keep seeing santas and elves dressed up trick or treating. THIS WILL NOT STAND. we shall defend our holiday, whatever the cost may be, we shall trick or treat on the porches, we shall trick or treat on the candy stands, we shall trick or treat in the corners and in the streets, we shall trick or treat in the hills; we shall never surrender, and even if, which I do not for a moment believe, this festival or a large part of it were subjugated and starving, then our holiday beyond the seas, armed and guarded by the halloween parade, would carry on the struggle, until, in gods' good time, the new treats, with all their power and might, step forth to the rescue and the liberation of the charlseton chew.